Schechner’s Sports Stop is a

regular feature of the Pool and Spa News enewsletter. The

opinions expressed herein are solely those of Managing Editor Dan

Schechner, and do not necessarily reflect the views of Pool and

Spa News, its parent company or affiliates. Any similarities to

actual, well-conceived opinions are purely coincidental and likely

of a fleeting nature. In other words, this is for entertainment

purposes only. 
Schechner’s Sports Stop is a regular feature of the Pool and Spa News enewsletter. The opinions expressed herein are solely those of Managing Editor Dan Schechner, and do not necessarily reflect the views of Pool and Spa News, its parent company or affiliates. Any similarities to actual, well-conceived opinions are purely coincidental and likely of a fleeting nature. In other words, this is for entertainment purposes only. 
 

In lieu of a column on whether Alex Rodriguez has a more promising future in poker than he does with the Yankees, I give you scattered thoughts…

Boxer Christy Martin says she’s never fighting in California again after officials there recently upheld a referee’s decision to stop her last match when she broke her hand in the final round.

The injury occurred during a June 4 bout at L.A.’s Staples Center, just as Martin was pummeling the daylights out of Dakota Stone. (Fantastic boxing name by the way, on par with the likes of Jimmy Thunder and Eric Crumble.)

Anyway, Martin’s appeal was filed by none other than Hollywood

socialite

attorney Gloria Allred, who claimed sex discrimination in arguing that the fight would not have been stopped if a male boxer had sustained the same injury. 

But here’s the kicker: I actually agree with Allred — even despite the fact that her previous clients include an adult film actress, multiple Hooters waitresses (in a class action suit against the restaurant chain), a massage therapist/ prostitute, and not one but TWO of Tiger Woods’ alleged mistresses.

The point being that Martin may very well have the highest pain threshold this side of the Terminator. After all, it was she who, back in November, was involved in a domestic dispute with her husband, James, in which Christy was stabbed multiple times, then shot in the leg and torso.

And seven months later she’s back in the ring!

That’s one tough cookie. They should’ve let her finish.

I’m now convinced that nothing goes south faster than a conversation with customer service from my credit card company. The other day I called to activate a new card. Seems simple enough, right? And we were doing fine until the following exchange took place:

Customer Service Rep: Now that we have your card activated, Mr. Schechner, I’d like to talk to you for a moment about identity theft.

Me: Huh?

Rep: Did you know that thousands of people across the country have their identities stolen each day?

Me: Why are you telling me this?

Rep: Because [credit card company] now offers identity-theft protection for only a dollar a day for the first month as a special promotion to our valued card holders.

Me: Look, I’m pretty sure nobody wants to steal my identity. I don’t even want it half the time.

Rep: So we’ll get you all set up then, OK?

Me: Wait, what? No! Hold on, can you just tell me if my card is still activated?

Rep: You’re now registered for our free 30-day identity-theft protection trial. Thank you for calling [credit card company]. Goodbye.

Me: H-hello?

It’s always fun when history repeats itself — unless, of course, it involves potential violations by the team you grew up idolizing.

Which is why I was saddened to learn that the NCAA is investigating the University of Miami football program over allegations that a former booster (and confessed Ponzi schemer) bestowed gifts and services on current and former players. You’ll remember these same Hurricanes were slapped with NCAA sanctions in 1996 for a litany of infractions that included “pay-for-play” and fraudulently obtained financial aid.

According to the Associated Press, new head coach Al Golden “said he emailed his team ‘every day this summer’ about avoiding problems that recently hit other schools … He said his players have a ‘Cane Code’ reminding them about such issues.”

Isn’t that sweet? They have a “Cane Code.” Problem is, it’s Miami, which means the code we’re talking about probably doesn’t refer to sugar cane. (Remember Scarface?)

This will not end well.

Anyone know when basketball season starts?