Adam Carolla had some choice words to say about pool guys.
During the sort of long-winded rant for which the comedian is famously known, Carolla shared that he’s had a string of lousy pool guys lately and described in hilarious detail how each failed to meet the “Ace Man’s” expectations.
“I’ve had a pool man who I fired because he wouldn’t close the doors that I built to keep the rats out of where the pool motor was,” Carolla said. “He’d simply open them [mess] around and leave them wide open.”
The other guy had a habit of dumping the strainer basket into the flower bed instead of the green trash can a few feet away.
“At some point I said to him ‘Stop doing that!’”
Did the guy listen? No. And Carolla had to let him go, too.
At least Pool Guy No. 3 disposed of the debris properly ... at first. Carolla even thanked him for doing what the last guy had refused to do. But on subsequent visits, he simply dumped soaking wet leaves into the flower bed.
“I said, ‘Well time to fire the pool guy.’”
Then there was the guy who couldn’t be bothered with tethering the floating thermometer, causing Carolla to fish the thing out of the strainer basket every day. He would leave the thermometer on top of the skimmer lid, hoping the pool pro would get the hint.
He never did.
“I think his excuse would be ‘I didn’t have twine on me,’” Carolla said. “Is he a pool man? I think that’s the question. No, he’s not a pool man.”
Now, for those unfamiliar Mr. Carolla’s comedic stylings, his ability to endlessly complain about life’s little annoyances is something to behold.
But this particular tirade contained some solid advice from someone who can relate with the workaday struggles of the common contractor.
You see, long before Carolla cemented himself as the reigning podcast king – his daily show is the most downloaded, according to the Guinness Book of World Records – he was a low-wage carpenter. (His blue-collar background provides plenty of comedic fodder for his podcasts, books and his excellent 2007 film The Hammer.) Rather than cut corners, he decided to be the very best carpenter he could be.
“And you know what? I was almost immediately happier and almost immediately more satisfied ... I'm not doing the proverbial dump-the-leaves-in-the-flower-bed," he said.
He concluded his rant by imploring contractors to take pride in their craft.
“My plea for everyone in life is … do the job for you.”
Wise words from America's greatest wise ass.
Off the Deep End is an occasional blog from PSN Senior Editor Nate Traylor.